THE BEST OF MARVEL
Spider-Men was a brilliant concept from the start- Miles Morales (the Spidey of Ultimate Marvel) is coming very close to being as iconic as Peter Parker, so it’s pretty amazing to see them both team up. Basically, a villainous accident sent Peter into the Ultimate Universe, where he met up with Miles, fought bad guys, and tried to get home. Since this is the last in a 5-issue miniseries, obviously we know he’s going to do just that. What else does it bring to the table? Well, think of all the things you love about Spidey: the heartwarming devotion to his family, the inspiring way he stands up for justice, the one-liners. Then double it. They take turns setting each other up for one-liners, their powers and fighting styles complement each other, and they even like each other (which is generally rare with other-world counterparts). Peter’s parting words to Miles manage to combine hilarity with RIGHT IN THE FEELS, and a last-panel stinger means the story isn’t over yet…
The last issue in the Final Exam arc (in which Enchantress teams up with student Jeremy Briggs, who was apparently evil all along… what the hell kind of evil name is Jeremy Briggs anyway?) wraps things up as final issues generally do. Ever since the first few issues, it’s been established that the academy was set up to prevent the students turning evil, and rather than use that as a cheap ploy to add en edge, it actually still comes into play now, years later. Their methods would undoubtedly be disapproved of by the Avengers, but their intentions are good and their loyalty to each other unwavering. The grownups are right to be worried…
The Avengers #30 (writer: Brian Michael Bendis; artists: Walter Simonson & Scott Hanna)
This has all the hallmarks of a good comic: epic splash pages of Avengers assembling, heroes taking on twenty mooks each without breaking a sweat, and a villain proclaiming it was their plan all along. What makes this one of the funniest issues of anything I have read in a long time is that Hawkeye and Spider-Woman have a lover’s quarrel, whilst fighting the aforementioned mooks. For about twenty pages. I can’t describe it in a way that does it justice, but trust me, if you buy this comic your life will be better.
New Mutants #49 (writers: Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning; artists: Felix Ruiz & Klebs)
Another arc-wrapper-upper from Marvel. Usually I hate wrapups almost as much as origin stories, so between DC’s Zero Month and Marvel’s purely coincidental Every Arc Ends Week, this is a hard week for me. But I persevere. So. New Mutants wraps up the Fight the Future arc decently enough. The time paradox exploited to make Evil Cypher’s defeat possible seems sound, but it’s probably best not to think about it too hard lest plot holes start to appear. That’s all par for the course with comic book science, though, so I can forgive it. Plus it has Warlock in, and I love Warlock.
DON’T WASTE YOUR MONEY ON
Dark Avengers #181 (writer: Jeff Parker; artist: Neil Edwards)
I’ll be honest, I’ve never seen the point in Dark Avengers. OK, it was relevant back when Norman Osborn was in charge of the Avengers and the whole team had been replaced by near-identical copies; but now it feels like Marvel just wants to get twice the money for the same characters. Sorry, they’re not the same characters, they have different names, slightly different powers, even different-coloured hair in the case of Scarlet Wi– I mean Toxie Doxie.
And they know, they know that it’s confusing. That’s why the characters cannot get to the end of a sentence without mentioning the name of the person they’re talking to. It’s like Moonstone is thinking to herself I mustn’t call her Scarlet Witch; her name’s Doxie. Doxie Doxie Doxie. and keeps repeating this in her head so the Doxies just slip out, like Tourette’s. “Hey Doxie, did you hear that noise Doxie? Let’s check it out Doxie!”
The final page contains the hook “NEXT: The End.” We can but hope.
(Also, Doxie means prostitute. It’s hard to take a comic seriously when characters keep yelling “Prostitute! Look out!”)
ALSO
Matt Murdock goes mental in Daredevil #18!
Terry goes through some pretty epic life changes in X-Factor #244!
Venom thinks happy thoughts in Venom #25!
THE BEST OF DC
I admit it, this is such a favourite for me because it’s not in the main 52, and is therefore not taking part in the enforced fun that is Zero Month. Instead, it fills i
n some of the blanks between the two series of the Young Justice TV show. It takes place closer to the second series than the first, so no buried secrets are spilled here; in fact it seems more like episodes they wanted to write but didn’t have time for, understandable given that Greg Weisman has written both this comic and the show. It’s definitely aimed at kids and teenagers, so no violent musings on human nature and the like, but it’s easy to pick up and read without feeling like you’re missing something, or worse, like you’re being spoon-fed a bitesize origin story so your teeny-tiny brain doesn’t explode. No, I will not let this go.
OK, obviously it’s another origin story which I am really trying to stop mentioning but can’t help myself. I’m sorry. So sorry. It’s framed as Kate retelling her past in the present, in the form of a video letter to her dad which she records every night before she goes on patrol in case she doesn’t come back. I hope for her sake that she doesn’t go into this much detail every time, otherwise that’d be time-consuming and repetitive. I’m being all blasé about it, but the truth is, I cried like a small child. Every bad thing that’s happened to her, everything she put herself through to be a better hero, the moment she finally became Batwoman… I could barely read through the tears. She’s a fighter, and she’s a total badass, and she’s my new favourite superhero.
This is quite possibly the best thing I’ve read all week. Shazam! is the feature story this week, rather than the B-side, which was a long time coming. Billy Batson finally gets his powers and the results are amazing. The ‘gifts of the gods’ power set is altered in favour of a more streamlined version, but it works, and the way Billy deals with his powers is just extraordinary. Geoff Johns writes the 15-year-old Billy with such a perfect blend of childlike naiveté and tough-as-nails attitude that Shazam is undoubtedly going to become one of the most popular characters in the DC universe.
Justice League is an understated backup to this story, but still just as strong. The other two immortal sinners mentioned in The Phantom Stranger #0 are introduced, which has definitely made me interested in where they’re going to go with this…
Wonder Woman (writer: Brian Azzarello; artist: Cliff Chiang)
“The monthly monster strikes again!” is the opening line of this story, allegedly reprinted from All-Girl Adventure Tales for Men #41. This is as outrageous as this issue gets- not one arch comment about shoes or nails to be seen. I feel this was a bit of a wasted opportunity, but it’s a strong story nonetheless, about Diana’s training through her teen years which will eventually shape her into Wonder Woman, and the dedication and compassion which forms the basis of her hero code. This story wouldn’t seem out of place if played straight, but the shift in tone and art style gives it a different angle to all the other origin stories. Clearly a lot of fun was had during the making of this comic, which is great to see. If you’re looking for a tongue-in-cheek take on Golden Age sexism, you won’t find it here, but it’s a brilliant story nonetheless.
DON’T WASTE YOUR MONEY ON
DC Universe Presents (writers: Keith Giffen & Dan DiDio, James Robinson, Rob Liefeld, Tony Bedard; artists: Keith Giffen & Dan DiDio, Tom Derenick, Marat Mychaels, Carlos Rodriguez, Scott McDaniel)
DC Universe Presents has always been a great showcase for the lesser-known heroes to have some time in the limelight, but this month they scrap that plan in favour of giving us and origin story for every comic that was cancelled in the first wave. All of them except Static Shock, which was the only one that I was sad to see go.
I hated O.M.A.C. from the start, so most of that story was lost on me. Brother Eye makes a decent villain, but his habit of saying Eye instead of I gets real old, real quick.
Mister Terrific had promise, but got too bogged down in its clumsy handling of race relations (the low point was a side character telling Karen Starr “I’m a black woman, which means I’m built to handle things you can’t even imagine. Or never had to.”) This story, on the other hand, focussed more on the tech side of Mister Terrific- he is, after all, known as the smartest man in the DC universe, and not just “that black guy”. Unfortunately, my lack of love for Mr T meant I wasn’t really that engaged with this story either.
Hawk and Dove revolves around the avatars of War and Peace bickering with each other about whether or not Peace is necessary, and Dawn is shoehorned into Hank’s backstory in an attempt to make it look like they had a plan all along. Sadly, it doesn’t bring anything new or insightful to the War vs. Peace debate, and the retconning just makes Dawn look like a lying, conniving bitch. “Yeah, I dated your brother for ages and took his power at one point, but I’ll just pretend like that never happened and follow you around for a while so you don’t get suspicious.” Makes perfect sense.
Onto Blackhawks, in which any shred of hope I may have had that Zinda Blake would put in a New 52 appearance is incinerated forever. The underlying message behind this story is that in a world full of heroes, there are normal human soldiers doing heroic acts too. A noble message, which is slightly undermined by the tall, slim Lady Blackhawk catching a rocket launcher in one hand, firing it backwards into the creature attacking her still with one hand, and responding to the loss of an eye with “Yeah, yeah, I’ve got a spare…” She’s not a normal soldier. Also, we have a normal human superhero. He’s called Batman.
ALSO
The screwed-up life of Jason Todd- as told by The Joker! Red Hood and the Outlaws #0!
Not an origin story! Hurrah! Green Lantern: New Guardians #0!
Selina Kyle doesn’t exist? Then how can there be a Catwoman #0?